The Nardio Review


This never ends well

This never ends well

Is Golden House worth your time?



What should I play Golden House on?

I really recommend a tablet or large phone. You are going to want to see what is kicking your buttt over and over again.


Golden House cut sceneWhat do we think without spoiling it?

Do you like hard platformers? Did you ever play League of Evil and love it? Do you love a challenge? If you answered yes, then Golden House is for you. Best of all, Golden House is FREE! There is also a paid version of the game without ads. The ads are never intrusive, but I recommend getting the paid version and supporting the developer.

Golden House is a tough-as-nails platformer where you are trying to save your sister in a deathtrap of a house. It isn’t easy, but it’s fun.


How it plays and why it works:

Golden House gameplaySolid controls, cool retro tunes and kick-in-the-face gameplay that’s hard, but beatable. At least until level 20 for me. Level 20 kicks my butt and spits in my face. I keep going back making it further and further each play through. But I think I might bow out for a week or two at least, lick my wounds, play some easier games and come back with another false sense of readiness.

If you love tough games and crave that League of Evil/Dark Souls level of soul grinding difficulty this is it. If you are one of those people who expects your hand to be held or think this is something you can just blow through, you are out of luck. If you get mad easily do not play this game. You will throw your phone and I will think you are an idiot for doing so.

Best of all Golden House is still updating. Check out this tweet:


No like?

Level 20. Fuck you level 20. I know there is a lot more game here but you have to be such a stubborn pain in the ass merciless level. You just can’t let me beat the game and find my little sister. No, you are a horrible level, level 20. I hate you. I wanna see the next zone and you won’t let me.


Agree? Disagree? Write your comments below

Read our other App Reviews

Basic info:

  • Free and paid versions available
  • 32.7  MB
  • Universal app
  • 48 levels




Developer: Enano Games

Golden House Free edition iTunes

Golden House Premium edition iTunes



Bernardo Español

Hi I'm Bernardo Español. I'm a guy with way too much energy and not enough free time.

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